Thursday, July 12, 2007

When The Hell Is The 12th General Election?

Ah, the burning question...

RPK predicted it to be 19 May 2007, 25 November 2007, 15 December 2007 or 15 March 2008 via Bedol Feng Shui master's crystal ball.

Sheih says it will be as early as the 3rd next month.

Many people asked Citizen Nades of theSun also. But he asked us to look for these signs:

  • The state assemblyman/member of Parliament comes knocking on your door asking if he could be of any help. You don't have to look for him - he comes looking for you!
  • Elected representatives are pictured in the newspapers pointing to clogged drains and uncleared garbage.
  • The potholes along roads in the neighbourhood are filled.
  • Banners are put up by representatives with their photographs announcing that they had donated a trophy for the local basketball tourney.
  • Even the good work done by Rotary Clubs are hijacked for campaigning purposes. Heard of elected representatives offering to speak at their luncheon meetings?
  • For the neighbour's daughter's wedding, representatives arrive carrying huge gifts to announce their presents and presence.
  • Continuous barrage of press releases and statements from the representative's office making his already-known stand on issues.
  • After playing the angkat tangan role in the local council, they seem to at least give the impression that they are opposed to certain projects.
  • When there's a fire or accident, they position themselves to be in the frame with victims and the families when press photographers and TV cameramen are at work. This is the time they will make all kinds of statements besides expressing, sometimes, false sympathy.
  • If they are not doctors themselves, they would enlist the help of friends in the medical profession for free check-ups, screenings etc.
  • Some will discard their BMWs and Mercs and drive a Proton or a Kancil so as to not disclose their paths to instant wealth. Some will even go to the extent of being seen with "friendly" journalists on the LRT or bus. Then, they would come out with this famous line: "The only way forward is public transportation" but not knowing that a few nosey journalists have discovered that the other half is being chauffeur-driven in a limousine.
  • Banners appear in the local golf club announcing "Golf Amal YB So and So." But large sums have already been contributed by participants (read businessmen who want contracts). With so much at their disposal, the lesser mortals go home with big goodie bags and excellent lucky draw prizes. Even the wooden spoonists get a plasma TV!
  • In Parliament House, you ask for an MP's whereabouts, and you'd hear the familiar words: "Dia balik kawasan".
  • When manufacturers and importers of commodities plan to increase prices, they are vetoed.
  • The news from local television stations are littered with speeches made by politicians, often using the phrase:"we are for the people."
  • Of course, the whole system will not be complete without "projects" (read: money). Somehow, there will be peruntukan for new places of worship or an upgrading of the community hall.


Read his column today.

You know the date? ;-)

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